Last week one of the southeast’s most successful non-profit organizations, Envision Counselling and Support Centre, was celebrating their 25 years of serving the community.
A lot has been done and changed through this time. They affected many, many lives and they helped probably thousands of people who needed it. Through these years as they were growing and developing, they were constantly trying to find new ways to reach more people and find better ways to meet their needs.
And the community was there for this organization, volunteering, supporting, attending, spreading the word and helping in any possible way. As the organization was helping the southeast to be a better place, people were supporting Envision in its growth and success.
To celebrate these relationships, Envision gave Estevan and area a gift in the form of Theoren Fleury. This successful former NHL player had a name and a strong story of trauma, recovery and healing to tell. Even just these two elements, when put together, usually allow to affect many people.
While listening to Theo I was trying to understand, what else was making his speech quite influential and giving it a life-changing power. He explained that it was about making himself vulnerable and open for others. This helped to create a safe space where deeper conversations and healing may happen.
Many of you listened to him last week or heard him before. He was good. But when I was there I looked around and realized that yes, he was the guest speaker (a great guest speaker) and the celebration was built around him, but even being originally from this area, at this point he was more of an outsider who came here for some time to share his knowledge.
It was us, the people who were in the Power Dodge Ice Centre, who live in the southeast, who are able to create safe space, who are always will to support and generous in all they do. It was the community, the people attending that made the event so special.
I’ve been around for about six years now, and it keeps amazing me how open and generous people are in everything, be it time, money, expertise, connections or anything else. And they are willing to step in even before you ask.
An example, I was in a slow job-searching life phase but wasn’t really asking for help from anybody. Like always having 25 things on the go, I made a stop in one of the Estevan’s businesses. It wasn’t related to my job-search at all in the beginning, but it turned to be after all.
I knew the owner and one of the staff members there; together we volunteered at the Saskatchewan Summer Games back in 2016, but that was as far as we knew each other. I needed some work done and I thought they could help me with that. Both of them were at work.
One word led to another, and as I was talking about what I was busy with those days I mentioned that I was looking for a job. With no further questions, the owner picked up the phone, made a call and gave me recommendations. I didn’t ask for it (I didn't like asking for help in general then). To tell you more, I wasn’t even thinking that way, so I probably was even more grateful. He helped me because he could and probably felt that I needed it.
That was just one of the hundreds of examples of Estevan’s generousity and readiness to help. But one wise person once told me that if I want to build any kind of relationships I should learn how to ask for help.
The first time I heard it, I thought it was absurd. It didn’t make much sense to me. I always thought that providing help was more valuable while asking for help could make you feel vulnerable. And that was the answer. By making myself vulnerable I open up space and invite others into it. And that's where relationships develop, and that's where trauma heals, and that's where the community grows.
Just think about a situation when someone asked you to do something that was within your area of expertise, or just wasn’t difficult for you but important for another person.
When I started paying attention to it I realized that in cases like that I usually feel needed and valued, just better about myself. And it was actually much easier to step out of awkwardness especially with new people. Even the phrase “happy to help” reflects the emotional package that usually comes with any help you provide to others.
So helping is big, but providing help sometimes is even bigger. And it was a life-changing knowledge for me, which I'm still exploring.
But looking at people around me at Envision’s luncheon I knew that this community knows much more about both helping and reaching for help thus creating safe space for others and building relationships.
